doyle: tardis (angel/spike down on this ship by mouse)
doyle ([personal profile] doyle) wrote2004-05-17 08:06 pm

Puppet!Angel/Spike: Gepetto in the House

Title: Gepetto in the House
Author: Doyle
Pairing: Angel/Spike
Rating: PG-13
Notes: Backup fic for the Puppet!Angel ficathon. [livejournal.com profile] itsabigrock wanted the line "Haven't had to put this many stitches in you since Bucharest" and no violation of Angel's puppet-hole. I loved that last phrase so much I stole it.

"Shut up, Spike."

Spike raised his eyebrows in a parody of innocence. One hand hovered midair for a moment, as if he was wondering whether pressing it to his heart would be just too much of the drama queen, then it dropped back to the couch. It landed just a bit too close to Angel's leg for his liking and he glared, shuffling away. Spike's hands hadn't looked quite so big before. His whole body hadn't looked so big as it did right now, and Angel had had Spike kneeling on the floor in front of him plenty of times.

Two more days of this, if Fred was right (please, God, he thought fervently, let Fred be right, I don't care if she spends a whole year's budget on particle… studying… things, just make her right about this).

"Y'know…"

"Shut. Up. Spike."

"What?" Spike protested. "Didn't say a thing."

"You were going to. I know what you were thinking."

He scoffed, neatly biting off another length of thread. "Oh, not allowed to think, now? Not all of us can switch it off as easy as you." Frown of concentration as he joined thread and needle. "Not that there's a lot to be switched off, in your case."

Angel remembered - not without nostalgia - the days when one well-chosen insult would cut right across William's face like a whiplash. Those days had lasted maybe the grand total of three weeks, before the boy had learned to give as good as he got, if possible before he got it, even if that earned him a thrashing, or worse.

Good times.

He would have thought up something really clever and cruel to shoot back, but his concentration span had decreased along with his size and he found himself distracted by the needle. It was so shiny. And headed towards his felt skin-substitute and hey!

"Stop being an old woman," Spike complained. "Gimme the arm back."

"This was a bad idea. Lorne or Wes will be here in the morning, they can sew it back." He looked forlornly at his shoulder. "Till then, I'll just stay like this."

"And what if you turn back ahead of schedule?" He broke into a grin. "Come to think of it, that'd be funny. Could have us a remake of The Fugitive."

Reluctantly, and not admitting even to himself that Spike was right, he handed over his arm. Seeing it like that, detached from his body, was strange and upsetting. Even if it was tiny with stuffing hanging fluffily from the popped seam at the top, it was his arm.

"D'you think it'd make much of a difference if I sewed it on back to front?"

"Spike!"

"Just wondering." He held the arm up against Angel's body, looking at it critically. "This'll be easier if you take your clothes off."

Of all the lines Spike had used to get him naked over the years, that was… a fairly typical one. Angel had his suspicions - he wouldn't rule out any sexual kink when dealing with Spike - but he had to admit that sewing his arm back to his body would be easier than trying to sew through body and shirt and leather coat.

He was going to miss that coat, he thought, right until the point where he tried to take it off one-handed, and then he decided he'd be happy to never see it again. Spike had to help him, and that was humiliating enough before they got the shirt open, and then Spike was close to hysterical with laughter.

"Yes, I have nipples," Angel growled, adding his second and third prayer of the night in quick succession: that Spike would restrain himself from the phrase "wee little puppet nipples" and that he wouldn't take an interest in what was beneath the rest of his clothes.

He got part of his wish.

"They're buttons," Spike said, as if this was some delightful and awe-inspiring discovery, and then something even more interesting seemed to strike him. "Hey, bend forward."

Angel's eyebrows went up so far and so fast that the Velcro sticking them in place came loose. "What?! No!"

Spike rolled his eyes. "I want to see if you've still got your tattoo, you git. Trust me, your wee little puppet hole is safe from me."

Angel's lapsed Catholicism lapsed another few notches downwards.

"You want the arm back, show me the tat," Spike said, waggling the arm. A wisp of stuffing drifted to the floor.

With the long-suffering sigh of a puppet under severe pressure, Angel twisted around and dropped forward enough to let Spike see over his shoulder.

"The gryphon's still there," Spike reported. "S'got little cherub wings. And it's grinning."

His own tattoo was laughing at him. That officially made it everybody in the world. Except Nina, and after that thing with the dog, he wouldn't blame her. What the hell was it about being this shape that made him a target for canines? He couldn't even get breakfast without some goddamn mongrel ripping off one of his limbs. Just because he'd been holding bacon in his mouth because he didn't want to confess that he had no way of swallowing it… In the retelling, the terrier had become a Dobermann, and the bacon had been left out entirely. It was still hardly an epic tale of a champion's battle.

Spike's curiosity was apparently satisfied by the show and tell, because he set to with the needle. Angel winced at every in and out; it didn't hurt, exactly, but he could feel it puncture what he was stubbornly thinking of as his skin.

"Haven't had to put this many stitches in you since Bucharest," Spike murmured, tiny pink triangle of tongue sticking out the side of his month.

Angel gave him a cautious look, keeping as still as he could. No jokes, no sexual innuendo, just a straightforward statement of fact. That was worrying.

"Bucharest," he said. "That was right before I got the soul."

"Right after the run-in with that vampire hunter. Should've really seen that coming."

"How were we supposed to know Van Helsing was a real guy?" Angel protested, but he was thinking about that fight, how they'd barely escaped with their heads still attached. The girls had had a chance to run and they'd taken it - of course they had, so would he if it'd been one of the others in that damn trap. Spike had stayed, dragged him out of there before sunrise. Called him names all the way home. Angelus had given him a bloody lip for it. Compared to all their other fights, barely a love-tap.

There was a tingling coming back into his fingers.

"Almost done," Spike said.

"You're pretty good at this," he admitted, telling himself that he could claim later his puppet state had gone to his head.

Spike's expression didn't even flicker. "Used to be a toymaker, old little fella, worked out of a cabin in this village in Czechoslovakia. Did the whole Disney stereotype. Stories to kiddies, puppets all over the place. Brilliant work. Dru loved the dolls he made her."

"So maybe you picked up some of his genius when you ate him," Angel finished, unable to work up the energy to be truly disgusted.

"Yeah, probably," he agreed amiably. "There."

He flexed his four short fingers. Good as new. Huh.

"So," Spike said, bestowing him with a filthy leer, "what's inside the puppet pants?"

Two more days.

[identity profile] swmbo.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 12:23 pm (UTC)(link)
omg, buttons! Hee! *dies* I love it...this was hysterical and adorable and perfect characterization. *happy sigh*

Loved the glimpses of the past and the stoic suffering of now.

[identity profile] mallyns.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 12:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Aww!

That's so cute. I love it. Reading this has made my day. You know what would be even better.

Mr. Hand and puppet Angel fic. *eg* You know you wanna.

[identity profile] doyle_sb4.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 12:24 pm (UTC)(link)
Evil! Evil!

[identity profile] caille.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 12:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Brilliant. You are so talented you make my brain hurt. You know, in that really really good way.

[identity profile] killerweasel.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 12:34 pm (UTC)(link)
*massive fit of giggles*

I really have to stop reading this stuff at work. Just got a very odd look from a co-worker after I got to the 'button' part. :P

Thanks for writing it.

[identity profile] rusty_halo.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 12:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee. So cute--can I archive this one, too?

[identity profile] rusty_halo.livejournal.com 2004-05-24 08:10 am (UTC)(link)
Here it is:
http://www.allaboutspike.com/fic.html?id=1066

Please just let me know if you'd like me to change anything.

Thanks!

[identity profile] thenyxie.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 01:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Aw! So cute and such dead on characterization. You write these two together so naturally. Love the buttons! Hee!

[identity profile] flurblewig.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 01:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, dude, that was so cute. Funny & sweet and perfectly characterised.

My worship of you continues unabated :-)
ext_10268: (Default)

[identity profile] fenwic.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 01:32 pm (UTC)(link)
As usual, so much depth in so few words. Love how you weave (slashy, yay!) history so organically in with the story. I love that Will saved Angelus, and I lovelovelove every word about the tattoo. Also the shiny-sharp dialogue and perfect comedy.

Thanks for another brilliant story :)

[identity profile] gobi-rex.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 01:40 pm (UTC)(link)
I love the characterization in this story. Ah, the whole thing is just perfect. And serious Spike is always a treat, even if only for a short while.

I think my favorite is the tattoo bit.

[identity profile] attaining.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 02:06 pm (UTC)(link)
Wee! That was brilliant! I loved it. :)

[identity profile] riddering.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 02:10 pm (UTC)(link)
You are a genius and I love you. This was so much fun to read...three times. ;) Angel's train of thought was absolutely hilarious and the buttons killed me dead.

"So," Spike said, bestowing him with a filthy leer, "what's inside the puppet pants?"

Inquiring minds still want to know. If nipples are buttons...?

[identity profile] doyle_sb4.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 02:19 pm (UTC)(link)
Bwa! My lips and Angel's flies are sealed *g*

[identity profile] jidabug.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 02:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee! That was very funny and true to character. Thanks for the laugh this afternoon.

[identity profile] paratti.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 02:44 pm (UTC)(link)
This was perfect: history, snark, warmth, tats and above all, buttons! Superb.

[identity profile] sangpassionne.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 02:49 pm (UTC)(link)
So so cute. Angel's internal monologue always has the potential to be amusing and this was hysterical. Especially the terrier and the bacon ::snerk::

[identity profile] itsabigrock.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 05:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks for that Doyle. At last I don't get stiffed *or* disappointed. That's a very groovy feeling. I kind of thought the tattoo was going to be Big Bird, so the cherub wings were just lovely. And thanks for actually working in the goodies I wanted and knowing me well enough to fit it into my ideas of canon. Just stunning.

Would you mind if I put this in the puppet section at CP&D? It'll make a great addition.

[identity profile] doyle_sb4.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 05:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Ooh, please do! And damn, if I'd thought of Big Bird I'd have done that. *g*

[identity profile] kita0610.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 08:04 pm (UTC)(link)
I want this for StA too, OK?

I think this makes four, which means you get your own page and a blurb. Anything particular you want me to blurb about you, or shall I wing it?

[identity profile] doyle_sb4.livejournal.com 2004-05-18 03:43 am (UTC)(link)
Of course, and yay! Can't think of anything for the blurb so anything's good. :dances:

[identity profile] ryokoblue.livejournal.com 2004-05-17 08:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Wee little button nipples! Hee! Very funny and cute! Good Spike/Angel makes me sigh. Puppet!Angel is no exception. Love to see more!

[identity profile] naeara.livejournal.com 2004-05-19 11:34 am (UTC)(link)
Got here through a link in [livejournal.com profile] riddering's journal and just wanted to say how much I completely loved this. I've been feeling terrible all day because it all ends tonight and this is just what I needed for a lift in spirits. Thank you! You rock!

Wee little puppet buttons..and more!!

[identity profile] onyxwillow.livejournal.com 2004-12-01 05:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Loved it Doyle.I read it before-can't remember where.Thanks so much for the rec at Cafe Caritas!!

Huggs and Hershey kisses,
Cleta

[identity profile] effulgentnida.livejournal.com 2005-10-01 03:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Angel's eyebrows went up so far and so fast that the Velcro sticking them in place came loose

hehe I loved it!

[identity profile] mmebahorel.livejournal.com 2006-01-01 05:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Wee little puppet nipples!

(wandered over because you wrote my brilliant Yuletide present. And eeee, puppet!Angel!!! And perfect Spike.)