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Jan. 25th, 2004 12:13 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
doyleSo ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
connorbeast and I were talking about weird pairings. We got onto Buffy/Connor and how it could be made to work, post-Chosen.
connorbeast says:
so buffy gives connor the speech about density
connorbeast says:
I wrote density
doyle:
yep
connorbeast says:
as in mass divided by volume
connorbeast says:
okay then she's his science teacher . Human AU.
And then I wrote Buffy/Connor human AU :facepalms:
(ETA: yeah, a title would be good. Okay... Fate (or Maybe Density))
"Oh my God, guess what?"
"What?" Connor sighed, not looking up from the vampire he was doodling on his lab book. Long, long experience of being Andrew's friend told him that this revelation could be anything from the soda machine running out of Dr. Pepper to evil music demons invading the Bronze and making everybody sing Barry Manilow.
Andrew leaned across the desk dramatically. "Dr. Burkle totally had a schizo breakdown. I heard they found her in the Chem lab writing Kill All Students over the walls." He frowned. "Or maybe it was calculus equations. Anyway, the school, like, had to give her a ton of time off till she stops being crazy, so we get a substitute - hi, Dawn. What's up, girlfriend?"
Dawn was scrunched low in her chair, nose nearly touching the page in front of her. "I'm studying," she said. "Leave me alone."
Andrew nodded a way that he probably imagined made him appear deep and understanding, rather than looking like he should be in a car's back window. "It's okay to be snippy. At certain times, say every month..."
"If the next words out of your mouth are 'flowering womanhood' I'll make you into a woman," she said, tone never changing.
Connor smiled. Dawn kicked ass. Some day he was going to put her in the comics he and Andrew made up, and she could be a witch or a vampire-hunter. Something cool.
His two best friends sulked in silence for a few minutes, until Andrew said, "I like your hair-thing," and she touched the slide and smiled a little bit and then they were okay again. They'd been fighting and making up at least eight times a day in the whole year he'd known them, and he was guessing they'd been that way since kindergarten.
"It's ten-fifteen," Dawn said, sounding kind of on edge as she checked her watch.
"Ooh, if the new teacher doesn't show, dibs on putting magnesium on fire with the Bunsen burners," Andrew said.
Dawn looked at her watch again, as if she could will it faster. "Isn't there some rule that says if they're fifteen minutes late we can go?"
"Only in college," Cassie said from the seat on Dawn's other side. "And even then, urban legend. Anyway, the substitute'll be here in a few minutes." She didn't look up from her notebook as she spoke. Connor couldn't see what she was writing, but he bet it wasn't dumb love-notes or something. Poetry, maybe. Cassie was cool like that, introspective and knowing, like she could always tell what was coming. He liked that; liked her.
He turned back to his own artistic endeavour, idly filling in the dark sky around some of the tombstones. So, another teacher down, only ninety percent of the faculty still to go. Ms. Rosenberg was still 'on leave', and Kennedy's seat at the back of the room was empty. Word was her dad had gone nuts and moved her to a private school. Now their science teacher, too. Dr. Burkle was nice and all, and if half of what Andrew was saying was true - which, he guessed, could happen, someday - then he felt bad for her. But who cared about Physics class anyway?
He held that opinion for exactly another eight and three-quarter seconds, until the door swung open and a goddess walked into the room.
The point of his pencil snapped against the page, leaving the vamp with an extra fang in the middle of its nose. Connor didn't notice. He was too busy staring at the woman struggling to keep hold of her bag and the pile of books and hold open the door for Vi and Amanda's usual late arrival. She managed to make it to the desk without looking too clumsy, not that it mattered to Connor. He was too distracted by her. She didn't look to be more than a few years older than he was, and he was captivated by the shoulder-length hair, the colour of spun gold and - okay, when his internal monologue sounded like Andrew, that was a bad sign. He cleared his throat, the noise sounding awkward and forced, and sat up straighter.
The teacher smiled around at them, and Connor was swept away on a wicked endorphin/hormone tsunami. If the smile was a little too bright and the raging terror was clear beneath the surface, that just made her more attractive.
"Hi... uh, good morning, class," she said. "I'm going to be filling in for Dr. Burkle for a while. My name's Ms. Summers - that's Ms. S-U..." She turned to chalk it up on the board, and for the first time Connor realized that Dawn had slid so far down in her seat she was nearly on the ground.
And then he made the connection between the names, and the big sister Dawn sometimes complained about, usually with much eye-rolling.
"Okay," Ms. Summers said, facing them again with that oh-god-in-heaven-save-me-or-at-least-make-me-look-competent smile back in place. "So, I have Dr. Burkle's lesson plan, and today we're looking at destiny." There were a few muted snickers at the back of the room. She quickly checked her page. "Density. Which is... how much stuff there is inside... stuff," she finished, her face saying that even she knew it was lame.
Connor wanted to protect her and stop anything from hurting her ever again, even her own wacky knowledge of science.
By the end of the class he'd realised that even Chao-Ahn the exchange student could teach the class better than she could, and when they were testing the density of solids Ms. Summers had dropped a beaker of water and gotten her blouse wet, and Connor had had to think very hard about unsexy things to stop himself from getting Up With Physics. The lunchlady naked. Andrew in Princess Leia's gold bikini. His uncle Wesley nak... and in a very repressed corner of his brain that wasn't such an unsexy thing, and was therefore not to be thought of ever again.
Ms. Summers smiled weakly at them, ineffectually brushing the water off her top.
She was so the best teacher ever.
The stupid bell stupidly rang too soon. Modern History and Computer class dragged, time stretching out so much that Connor wondered if the school was travelling at near-light speed, or if a hole in the space-time continuum had opened up beneath them. By recess he felt like a million years had passed, and he was more in love than ever.
At lunch, Dawn left for her yearbook committee meeting and Cassie said something about catching up on her ceramics homework at the library. That left Connor, Andrew and Carlos to eat on the bleachers. Andrew picked the spot, somewhere that coincidentally perfectly placed them to watch the football team run laps as the Coach roared 'encouragement'.
"Dude, Dawn's mom is hot," Carlos said, around bites of his sandwich.
Connor ignored him. He was trying to recall every single thing Dawn had ever said about her sister, starting with her name. It started with a B, he knew. Bettina? Nah, fluffier and not so much like the offspring of Kermit and Miss Piggy. Billie? Maybe...
Wait, fluffier. Fluffy. Buffy. He remembered being incredulous that Dawn's mom would casually inflict such child abuse on her eldest daughter.
Buffy, he thought dreamily.
"Ooh, new drawing? Lemme see," Andrew said, and took the book from his hands before he could stop him. He studied the picture with all the gravitas of the New York Times' art critics' boss. "Good composition, nice form, and - is the vampire exploding to dust? Are we going with that? That's cool." He peered at the page. "The girl's teeny, though, she could never kick vampire ass Reynolds-style."
"Could too," he said, wounded on behalf of his creation.
"Hmm," Andrew disagreed. "Okay, what's her name?"
"Buffy," he said, not caring what would happen when Dawn caught up to them later and wanted to know about the comic.
" 'Buffy the Slayer of the Vampyres', " Andrew said. "Cool."
connorbeast and I were talking about weird pairings. We got onto Buffy/Connor and how it could be made to work, post-Chosen.connorbeast says:
so buffy gives connor the speech about density
connorbeast says:
I wrote density
doyle:
yep
connorbeast says:
as in mass divided by volume
connorbeast says:
okay then she's his science teacher . Human AU.
And then I wrote Buffy/Connor human AU :facepalms:
(ETA: yeah, a title would be good. Okay... Fate (or Maybe Density))
"Oh my God, guess what?"
"What?" Connor sighed, not looking up from the vampire he was doodling on his lab book. Long, long experience of being Andrew's friend told him that this revelation could be anything from the soda machine running out of Dr. Pepper to evil music demons invading the Bronze and making everybody sing Barry Manilow.
Andrew leaned across the desk dramatically. "Dr. Burkle totally had a schizo breakdown. I heard they found her in the Chem lab writing Kill All Students over the walls." He frowned. "Or maybe it was calculus equations. Anyway, the school, like, had to give her a ton of time off till she stops being crazy, so we get a substitute - hi, Dawn. What's up, girlfriend?"
Dawn was scrunched low in her chair, nose nearly touching the page in front of her. "I'm studying," she said. "Leave me alone."
Andrew nodded a way that he probably imagined made him appear deep and understanding, rather than looking like he should be in a car's back window. "It's okay to be snippy. At certain times, say every month..."
"If the next words out of your mouth are 'flowering womanhood' I'll make you into a woman," she said, tone never changing.
Connor smiled. Dawn kicked ass. Some day he was going to put her in the comics he and Andrew made up, and she could be a witch or a vampire-hunter. Something cool.
His two best friends sulked in silence for a few minutes, until Andrew said, "I like your hair-thing," and she touched the slide and smiled a little bit and then they were okay again. They'd been fighting and making up at least eight times a day in the whole year he'd known them, and he was guessing they'd been that way since kindergarten.
"It's ten-fifteen," Dawn said, sounding kind of on edge as she checked her watch.
"Ooh, if the new teacher doesn't show, dibs on putting magnesium on fire with the Bunsen burners," Andrew said.
Dawn looked at her watch again, as if she could will it faster. "Isn't there some rule that says if they're fifteen minutes late we can go?"
"Only in college," Cassie said from the seat on Dawn's other side. "And even then, urban legend. Anyway, the substitute'll be here in a few minutes." She didn't look up from her notebook as she spoke. Connor couldn't see what she was writing, but he bet it wasn't dumb love-notes or something. Poetry, maybe. Cassie was cool like that, introspective and knowing, like she could always tell what was coming. He liked that; liked her.
He turned back to his own artistic endeavour, idly filling in the dark sky around some of the tombstones. So, another teacher down, only ninety percent of the faculty still to go. Ms. Rosenberg was still 'on leave', and Kennedy's seat at the back of the room was empty. Word was her dad had gone nuts and moved her to a private school. Now their science teacher, too. Dr. Burkle was nice and all, and if half of what Andrew was saying was true - which, he guessed, could happen, someday - then he felt bad for her. But who cared about Physics class anyway?
He held that opinion for exactly another eight and three-quarter seconds, until the door swung open and a goddess walked into the room.
The point of his pencil snapped against the page, leaving the vamp with an extra fang in the middle of its nose. Connor didn't notice. He was too busy staring at the woman struggling to keep hold of her bag and the pile of books and hold open the door for Vi and Amanda's usual late arrival. She managed to make it to the desk without looking too clumsy, not that it mattered to Connor. He was too distracted by her. She didn't look to be more than a few years older than he was, and he was captivated by the shoulder-length hair, the colour of spun gold and - okay, when his internal monologue sounded like Andrew, that was a bad sign. He cleared his throat, the noise sounding awkward and forced, and sat up straighter.
The teacher smiled around at them, and Connor was swept away on a wicked endorphin/hormone tsunami. If the smile was a little too bright and the raging terror was clear beneath the surface, that just made her more attractive.
"Hi... uh, good morning, class," she said. "I'm going to be filling in for Dr. Burkle for a while. My name's Ms. Summers - that's Ms. S-U..." She turned to chalk it up on the board, and for the first time Connor realized that Dawn had slid so far down in her seat she was nearly on the ground.
And then he made the connection between the names, and the big sister Dawn sometimes complained about, usually with much eye-rolling.
"Okay," Ms. Summers said, facing them again with that oh-god-in-heaven-save-me-or-at-least-make-me-look-competent smile back in place. "So, I have Dr. Burkle's lesson plan, and today we're looking at destiny." There were a few muted snickers at the back of the room. She quickly checked her page. "Density. Which is... how much stuff there is inside... stuff," she finished, her face saying that even she knew it was lame.
Connor wanted to protect her and stop anything from hurting her ever again, even her own wacky knowledge of science.
By the end of the class he'd realised that even Chao-Ahn the exchange student could teach the class better than she could, and when they were testing the density of solids Ms. Summers had dropped a beaker of water and gotten her blouse wet, and Connor had had to think very hard about unsexy things to stop himself from getting Up With Physics. The lunchlady naked. Andrew in Princess Leia's gold bikini. His uncle Wesley nak... and in a very repressed corner of his brain that wasn't such an unsexy thing, and was therefore not to be thought of ever again.
Ms. Summers smiled weakly at them, ineffectually brushing the water off her top.
She was so the best teacher ever.
The stupid bell stupidly rang too soon. Modern History and Computer class dragged, time stretching out so much that Connor wondered if the school was travelling at near-light speed, or if a hole in the space-time continuum had opened up beneath them. By recess he felt like a million years had passed, and he was more in love than ever.
At lunch, Dawn left for her yearbook committee meeting and Cassie said something about catching up on her ceramics homework at the library. That left Connor, Andrew and Carlos to eat on the bleachers. Andrew picked the spot, somewhere that coincidentally perfectly placed them to watch the football team run laps as the Coach roared 'encouragement'.
"Dude, Dawn's mom is hot," Carlos said, around bites of his sandwich.
Connor ignored him. He was trying to recall every single thing Dawn had ever said about her sister, starting with her name. It started with a B, he knew. Bettina? Nah, fluffier and not so much like the offspring of Kermit and Miss Piggy. Billie? Maybe...
Wait, fluffier. Fluffy. Buffy. He remembered being incredulous that Dawn's mom would casually inflict such child abuse on her eldest daughter.
Buffy, he thought dreamily.
"Ooh, new drawing? Lemme see," Andrew said, and took the book from his hands before he could stop him. He studied the picture with all the gravitas of the New York Times' art critics' boss. "Good composition, nice form, and - is the vampire exploding to dust? Are we going with that? That's cool." He peered at the page. "The girl's teeny, though, she could never kick vampire ass Reynolds-style."
"Could too," he said, wounded on behalf of his creation.
"Hmm," Andrew disagreed. "Okay, what's her name?"
"Buffy," he said, not caring what would happen when Dawn caught up to them later and wanted to know about the comic.
" 'Buffy the Slayer of the Vampyres', " Andrew said. "Cool."
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
on 2004-01-24 04:18 pm (UTC)::runs off screaming::
no subject
on 2004-01-24 04:22 pm (UTC)And I adore Buffy/Connor as a pairing - there should be tons more fic. *willnotmakesitewillnotmakesite*
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on 2004-01-24 04:23 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 04:27 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 04:32 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 04:40 pm (UTC)::scampers off to rec::
no subject
on 2004-01-24 05:33 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 04:44 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 04:49 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 04:53 pm (UTC)I was trying for a while to get someone to write a post-home connor in college who has buffy as a teacher for soemthing like p.e. or self-defense. She is trying to be normal but keeps messing up in ways connor things are adorable, he is trying to ignore cracks in his reality... bada bing, crushing on buffy begins.
I miss Connor. *snif* I was hoping that he would at least get a mention in Angel's hallucinations, and am sorely disappointed that he did not.
no subject
on 2004-01-25 12:56 am (UTC)Ought to be posting the next part some time today, I hope.
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on 2004-01-25 05:24 am (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 04:53 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 04:54 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 05:00 pm (UTC)Ms. Summers had dropped a beaker of water and gotten her blouse wet, and Connor had had to think very hard about Principal Giles naked to stop himself from getting Up With Physics.
::dies::
no subject
on 2004-01-24 05:35 pm (UTC)Oh, and I'm friending you now. Just so you know.
no subject
on 2004-01-24 05:38 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 05:47 pm (UTC)*cough* I'm, like, the worst feedbacker ever, myself, so I'll let you off this once. :-)
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on 2004-01-24 05:48 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 05:40 pm (UTC)Doyle is a delight.
no subject
on 2004-01-24 05:47 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 05:50 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 06:41 pm (UTC)ROTFLMAO.
NakedGilesbadbadbadimageseerkk!
no subject
on 2004-01-24 06:44 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 07:46 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 08:41 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-24 10:37 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-25 02:14 am (UTC)I bow before you.
no subject
on 2004-01-25 05:35 am (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-25 12:38 pm (UTC)::worships you::
Longtime listener, first-time caller...
on 2004-01-25 01:02 pm (UTC)Oh, and since I'm here... thank you so much for your rec site. The re-design is fabulous. Is your own fic going to move there, too?
Re: Longtime listener, first-time caller...
on 2004-01-26 03:40 am (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-25 02:13 pm (UTC)Perfect last line, kid.
no subject
on 2004-01-25 07:37 pm (UTC)You made me like Buffy/Connor human AU. Wow. :-)
no subject
on 2004-01-26 11:25 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2004-01-27 12:01 pm (UTC)OMG, that was the most perfect story ever. Just completely brilliant.